Are Schools Replacing Parents?
I was talking with a few teachers last night and found out that public schools in our area are now teaching Character Training. Are schools replacing parents?
Now, I know I homeschooled all 4 of our kids so, I don’t really know what goes on in schools. But, when I was growing up character training was done at home.
These teachers said every year it’s getting worse, that kids have “no home training” as one of my kids friends used to say. They said they have no manners, they don’t say please and thank you and they’re just lacking common courtesy.
When did these things stop being taught at home? Don’t tell me it’s still being taught at home, because if it is, why are the schools now doing the parent’s job?
With my kids, please and thank you were some of the very first words they spoke. When did we stop using Yes Ma’am, No Sir, and other terms of respect? I required my kids to say “Yes Ma’am” and “No Ma’am”, as well as “Please” and “Thank you”. When did parents decide that was unnecessary?
If we don’t teach our kids to respect others what kind of country will this be when we’re old and need taking care of, who’s going to do that? And how will they treat us, if no one teaches them now?
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And pardon me, but, truthfully character “molding” should not begin AFTER they start attending school, it should have started WAAAY before then!
According to a 4H Youth Development program they’re training teachers how to teach the:
“Six Pillars of Character”
- Trustworthiness
- Respect
- Responsibility
- Fairness
- Caring
- Citizenship
Personally, I just feel like more and more the schools are taking over our jobs as parents. According to the teachers I spoke with, it’s necessary because the kids aren’t getting it at home.
Ok, so granted, I was a stay at home parent and that has to make a difference, I am sure. But, just because parents work, it doesn’t negate their responsibility to teach their children common courtesy and the 6 things listed above.
If this “course” were something that was to supplement teaching that kids were receiving at home, I would agree that it’s a great thing, to back the parents training up.
But according to the teachers I spoke with, it’s not a backup – these kids aren’t learning these things at home. The teachers I spoke with are teaching high school, too… even more shocking to me.
Have you noticed this at your school, or a lack of character training in your kid’s friends?
Lisa says
My son’s kindergarten class had someone in to teach them….how to brush their teeth. So yeah, that kind of made me give the class the side eye. Teachers are already stretched too thin…while I respect that some parents just don’t have the skills, I don’t know….I don’t know what the answers are.
Dian says
Lisa,
I have seen some crazy stuff and I don’t know either. I just worry about the future of these kids, of course, because the parents today who don’t have the skills to train them are leaving it to the school to give them “home training” as the teenagers used to call it and what does that bode for the next generation of kids? Will they automatically think that that’s why you send your kids to school? I am of the opinion that schools want your kids to start even earlier now than they did when my kids were growing up. What happens next? The school takes them at birth?
I don’t know what the answer is other than parents growing up and taking responsibility for the children they bring into this world.
Thanks,
Dian
Brittany @ Equipping Godly Women says
They can’t *replace* parents unless the parents aren’t doing their job. If the parents teach manners, then the teachers are only supporting what the parents are doing at home. Can’t see how reinforcing what children are learning at home would be a problem…?
But yes, lots of kids DON’T learn these skills at home. And so it falls on the teachers. I’m sure teachers would much rather be doing fun crafts with well behaved kids, but if the kids don’t know how to behave, then you have to start with character training and hope you have time to squeeze everything else in.
Either way, it’s certainly not the Teachers’ fault…
Dian says
Brittany,
I totally agree – it’s NOT the teacher’s job. But, what is a teacher to do if the parent’s aren’t doing their job?
I cannot believe that parent’s are willing to let other’s do their job, out of laziness, or wanting to be a friend to their kids. There is a balance in everything and people have lost that. You CAN have a good relationship with your kids and BE THEIR PARENT, too.
Like I said, if these things were being taught to BACK UP what the parents are teaching at home, great, but, the teachers I spoke with said these kids aren’t learning it at home at all. This is a sad statement to me.
Thanks for sharing,
Dian
Nita says
The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.
Dian says
Nita,
Unfortunately these days that is a scary thought…
Dian